You ever have that feeling when you are so sure something is the way it is and no other option is possible? Have you ever been in a situation where you are absolutely certain that something happened, but end up being completely wrong? I’ve lost track of the number of times that has happened to me. I remember one time in particular, way back in high school. We were out at the park playing basketball and it was getting dark outside. We were playing basketball in the dark, (yeah I know, awesome) and I thought I had clearly seen my teammate hit the ball out of bounds. The other team claimed he hit it out of bounds, and I clearly saw him hit it out of bounds, and so I agreed with the other team. My teammate was very adamant that he did not touch the ball at all. Me and him got into this huge argument and we were yelling at each other a lot. Finally he just gave up and so we gave the other team possession. After the game, one of the players on the other team admitted that he knocked it out of bounds and that they cheated, and he didn’t say anything because he thought our fighting was hilarious.

That memory has since BURNED into my skull forever. I was dead wrong. And yet, I was absolutely certain I was right. Earth shattered, I apologized and from then on made myself more aware that sometimes, even if you think you are right, you could be wrong. But how would you know? Feedback is one way. Getting feedback helps you see things from a different light that you wouldn’t have otherwise seen or thought. Maybe you chew gum really grossly and sound like a camel, but are unaware because nobody has ever said anything to you about it. Or you smell funny, or have terrible breath. Wouldn’t you rather know sooner rather than later?

Some people are mean spirited about it, or are just on some crazy power trip. You can essentially ignore these people. Others, however, really do have valuable feedback to provide. The best people to receive feedback from I find are usually the people who have no interest, are neutral, or indifferent to what you do with that feedback. And just because you receive feedback doesn’t mean you have to listen to it. Sometimes it won’t work for you. The best way to find out if it does or not is to try it out. If it helps, then go for it. If it doesn’t, then stop.

The important thing to keep in mind about feedback is not to take it personal. Some people are way sensitive with feedback and that is detrimental. Getting defensive is not really productive in dealing with feedback, although it is a natural response for many people. Take the feedback, soak it in, and see it not as a personal attack but rather advice that may help you in the long run.